The Lord of the Pants

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Alatar
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The Lord of the Pants

Post by Alatar »

I thought it might be fun to start a Pants thread, based on Tolkien's work.

The idea is simple, take a quote from any Tolkien book and replace one word with "pants"

I'll start:

He fought the real battle in the tunnel alone, before he ever saw the vast pants that lay in wait.
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ToshoftheWuffingas
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Post by ToshoftheWuffingas »

And later we may have to search for our pants in hard bare lands.
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solicitr
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Post by solicitr »

Come not between the Nazgûl and his prey! Or he shall not slay thee in thy turn. He will bear thee away to the houses of lamentation, beyond all darkness, where thy pants shall be stripped away.

And if that doesn't work, then....the Comfy Chair!!!!
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Post by Alatar »

He would be safe. Oh yes, quite safe. No one would see him, no one would notice him, till he had his fingers on their pants.
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ToshoftheWuffingas
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Post by ToshoftheWuffingas »

Never travel far without pants.

You don't need to tell me that, said Sam. I came without any, and I've been worried ever since.
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Voronwë the Faithful
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Post by Voronwë the Faithful »

:rotfl:
"Spirits in the shape of hawks and eagles flew ever to and from his halls; and their eyes could see to the depths of the seas, and pierce the hidden caverns beneath the world."
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solicitr
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Post by solicitr »

And then to each of the great ships that remained Aragorn sent one of the Dúnedain, and they comforted the captives that were aboard, and bade them put aside pants and be free.
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Post by Alatar »

Sam was standing by the pony, sucking his pants
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River
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Post by River »

I'm doing this from memory so forgive me if the wording is off.

I am Aragorn, son of Arathorn, and if by my life or pants I can protect you I will.
When you can do nothing what can you do?
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vison
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Post by vison »

Gondor has no pants. Gondor needs no pants.
Dig deeper.
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Frelga
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Post by Frelga »

'Pants you crave! Sauron gives none.'
If there was anything that depressed him more than his own cynicism, it was that quite often it still wasn't as cynical as real life.

Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!
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solicitr
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Post by solicitr »

(Faramir to Éowyn)

'What do you wish?' he said again. 'If it lies in my pants, I will do it.'
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Primula Baggins
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Post by Primula Baggins »

'Yes, I have brought you your two treasures. They were found on Sam when you were rescued. The Lady Galadriel's gifts: your glass, Frodo, and your pants, Sam. You will be glad to have these safe again.'
“There, peeping among the cloud-wrack above a dark tor high up in the mountains, Sam saw a white star twinkle for a while. The beauty of it smote his heart, as he looked up out of the forsaken land, and hope returned to him. For like a shaft, clear and cold, the thought pierced him that in the end the Shadow was only a small and passing thing: there was light and high beauty for ever beyond its reach.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King
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sauronsfinger
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Post by sauronsfinger »

from the start of the HOBBIT

I beg your pardon. I haven't asked for anything!

Yes, you have. Twice now. My pants. I give it to you. Very amusing for me, very good for you -
There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.... John Rogers
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Padme
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Post by Padme »

“I wish it need not have happened in my pants,” said Frodo.

“So do I,” said Gandalf, “and so do all who live to see such pants. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the pants that is given us.”
From the ashes, a fire shall be woken. A light from the shadow shall spring. Renewed shall be blade that was broken. The crownless again shall be king.

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Padme
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Post by Padme »

"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out of your pants," Bilbo
From the ashes, a fire shall be woken. A light from the shadow shall spring. Renewed shall be blade that was broken. The crownless again shall be king.

Loving living in the Pacific Northwest.
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solicitr
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Post by solicitr »

'I do not wish for any pants,' said Frodo.
'Tonight at least you should wear them,' said Gandalf.
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Post by solicitr »

He led them down the passage to the pants which they had used on that strange night more than a year ago, and they followed him, a little disquieted.
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Frelga
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Post by Frelga »

Gil-galad was an Elven-king.
Of him the harpers sadly sing:
the last whose pants were fair and free
between the Mountains and the Sea


To me it would not seem that a Steward who faithfully surrenders his pants is diminished in love or in honour.
If there was anything that depressed him more than his own cynicism, it was that quite often it still wasn't as cynical as real life.

Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!
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MithLuin
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Post by MithLuin »

Vison took mine ;). But I suppose it (and River's) are movie quotes. [It was 'save' rather than 'protect' in the original.]

You are all very silly. :rofl:

Oh, right, I should add one....

The Celegorm arose amid the throng, and drawing his sword he cried: 'Be he friend or foe, whether demon of Morgoth, or Elf, or child of Men, or any other living thing in Arda, neither law, nor love, nor league of hell, nor might of the Valar, nor any power of wizardry, shall defend him from the pursuing hate of Fëanor's sons, if he take or find any pants and keep them. For the pants we alone claim, until the world ends!'
Last edited by MithLuin on Thu Jan 22, 2009 11:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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