The Rankin Bass Tribute Thread

[Alatar]

Time to put on your Peril-Sensitive sunglasses. Horrors like this have to be experienced under controlled conditions.

Now, many people know about the Rankin Bass film of the Hobbit, and many people know about Ralph Bakshi's Lord of the Rings, but there is another movie that is spoken of by loremasters in hushed tones, and their faces blanche when it is mentioned and they fall silent. That movie is Rankin Bass' "Return of the King". This seems to have been a misguided attempt to finish the story that was so cruelly left incomplete by Bakshi. If only they could have understood the phrase "lesser of two evils".

With no attempt made to match the style of the earlier movie or indeed to explain anything of what had come before, they began the movie with Samwise outside Cirith Ungol and Frodo captive. No, that's not true. First they gave us Bilbo's 129th Birthday celebrations and the revelation that Frodo has lost a finger. Then a Minstrel of Gondor steps forward to sing "Frodo of the Nine Fingers" and we're off. As in the Hobbit, John Huston is Gandalf and Orson Bean is both Bilbo and Frodo. The most inspired piece of casting is Roddy McDowall as Samwise. Yes, that's Roddy McDowall of Planet of the Apes. That Roddy McDowall.

Now, for your pleasure, that well known orc marching song, "Where There's a Whip, There's a Way".

http://www.skynet.ie/~alatar/WhipWay.rm

Clips will be in Realplayer format for bandwidth reasons, so if you don't have it, install it. Its free.

http://www.real.com/

[MithLuin]

Yes, they did everything wrong....used Gandalf as a narrator (as in the "I wonder what's going to happen next?" kind of way), made Merry and Pippin speak oldfashioned English - well, I guess that's what you could call it - they said a lot of things like "nay" and "forthwith" Denethor is a crazy old guy who just kills himself...oh wait, that's different from Jackson's how? Merry and Pippin are taller than Frodo and Sam, not because of Ent-draughts, but because hobbits are just getting to be more human every passing year The strange vision of Mordor becoming a garden and everyone (even orcs!) smiling at each other in harmony is just . But trippy (or singing) orcs aside, what I cannot forgive them is their portrayal of Aragorn - he goes to the Black Gate thinking they are going to win, and he despises Gandalf as an old fool. He is proud and foolish.

No, despite its obvious shortcomings, [the timeframe is so skewed that a week passes between when Frodo claims the Ring and when Gollum confronts him!], it got some [very few!] things right. The battle between Éowyn and the Witchking is well done, for instance. And we do see the Black Ships in Denethor's palantír. And all the right people get on the ship at the end, more or less . And they included the Watcher at the gate at Cirith Ungol - if they could do it, PJ could have Oh...and I much prefer their Elrond to PJ's. Of course, I haven't seen it for several years, and I would probably wince a lot more, now.

My family occasionally sings the songs...'where there's a whip' and 'frodo, of the nine fingers, and the ring of DOOOOOM!!!!' I think it was a serious mistake to try to put those types of songs in the movie....but that's what they get for making it a sequel to their Hobbit .

[Pearly Di]

This demented movie makes me laugh so much I get hiccups.



Absolutely the most deliriously hilarious thing I've ever seen.

I would love to know the film-makers were smoking when they conceived of it, drew it, and produced it.

Oh, dear Eru. Elrond with stars whirling round his head. Bilbo and that birthday cake. Pippin sounding like Shaggy out of 'Scooby Doo'. Some surreal dream sequence of the Shire with two Orcs strolling across the fields and waving at Frodo and Sam. 'Where there's a whip there's a way' - classic. Oh, Lord. It's a work of genius.

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

This film makes me laugh so much I get tummy ache.

It should be required viewing for all Tolkien fans.

[truehobbit]

w00t - I've seen the "Where there's a whip, there's a way"-song!

Great post, and thanks so much for sharing that, Alatar! Yep, that's us marching up Arthur's Seat! I recognised people!

I've never seen the movie, I shouldn't mind a few more clips of those brilliant creations.

On a more serious note, though - or not - isn't it amazing they dedicated so much screen time to marching orcs?
And, what's more, isn't this a wonderful emancipatory statement?
We get to see the orcs not as mindless, murderous beasts, but as victims of their government! They would rather not go to war! They only do it because they are forced with brutal violence! And they are forced to march all day, which is cruel, too, and they are denied a break!
Doesn't it make you want to start an orc-liberation movement right now?
Free the Orcs!

[Pearly Di]

Indeed, Hobbi, that is Rankin Bass's greatest contribution to the Tolkien fandom.

Liberate those Orcs!

[Alatar]

Oh don't worry! Future installments will cover some of what you've mentioned. You will be delighted with PJ by the time I'm finished. Even his botched Éowyn and the WitchKing is better than the Cowboy Shebop version we get in Rankin Bass. Really. As for Denethor of the Eyebrow....

[truehobbit]

Hey, I loved Éowyn and the Wiki in PJs version!

[Old_Tom_Bombadil]

Oh, dear Eru. Elrond with stars whirling round his head...

...and don't forget the stylish beard.




I think all the folks attending the SF Moot in September should learn "Where there's a whip there's a way" so we can all sing it when we get together.

We get to see the orcs not as mindless, murderous beasts, but as victims of their government! They would rather not go to war! They only do it because they are forced with brutal violence! And they are forced to march all day, which is cruel, too, and they are denied a break!
Doesn't it make you want to start an orc-liberation movement right now?

Tolkien's orcs may have been murderous, but they weren't mindless. I don't think all of them were keen on going to war, either. Remember that Frodo and Sam were mistaken for deserters in Mordor. Apparently it wasn't all that uncommon for orcs to rebel against "their government". Those orc sergeants (or whatever they were) didn't carry whips for no reason...and it wasn't for lack of fish.


Speaking of an "orc-liberation movement", I recall going to a Tolkien-themed Halloween party and there were a few folks dressed as orcs claming to be part of the "Orc Anti-defamation League". Apparently they thought the orcs were unfairly portrayed in Jackson's films.

[Holbytla]

Good Lord !!!
This is sacrilege at its finest.
Is this supposed to be akin to The Attack Of The Killer Tomatoes or something?

[Voronwë the Faithful]

I think all the folks attending the SF Moot in September should learn "Where there's a whip there's a way" so we can all sing it when we get together.

I suddenly remembered I have another engagement that weekend.

[MithLuin]

When I read LotR aloud to my brothers, that was their first introduction to the book, but they'd already seen all the movies at that point [PJ hadn't made his yet, but he'd started ~ summer 2000]. So, when we got to Elrond, I helpfully told them that he was 'the guy with the stars around his head' from this movie . Then, every time afterwards that the name Elrond came up, they would say 'you mean the guy with the stars around his head?' because they knew it annoyed me (brothers )

But, honestly - their Elrond at least exudes elvishness and wisdom and lore - in a rather cartoony way, of course, but still. I much prefer that to the "I am an evil manipulative father" Elrond in PJ's. I could do without the beard and stars, of course . But I do like the way he reads the moon-letters on the map in the Hobbit.

[axordil]

I much prefer that to the "I am an evil manipulative father" Elrond in PJ's.

In this sentance, "evil" and "manipulative" are redundant with "father of a daughter".

PJ's Elrond is a tad more weary and cynical than Tolkien's, a fin-de-sicele vision of the character. This of course also makes him more interesting, since he has a conflict to deal with where JRRT's had none (at least outside of Appendix A).

[Primula Baggins]

All his grumpiness is redeemed, for me, in the scene where Arwen comes out from behind the banner at Aragorn's coronation. He is a loving father letting go of his daughter, grieving for that, but also a loving father watching his daughter come into joy, and rejoicing. It wrenches my heart.

And all in a scene where he has a single, mostly inaudible, line.

I suddenly remembered I have another engagement that weekend.

You try that and several very scary women, myself among them, will hunt you down and drag you to the m00t.

[Voronwë the Faithful]

Don't worry, Prim.

As for PJ's Elrond, as I've said at least a million times before, he is much more consistent with the Elves of the Silmarillion, particularly Thingol, then he is with the Elrond of Tolkien's LOTR.

Which I like.

[Old_Tom_Bombadil]

Don't worry, Prim.

Oh, good! That means I can start practicing...

Where there's a whip... *CRACK* ...there's a way!
Where there's a whip... *CRACK* ...there's a way!
Where there's a whip...



Wait! I got a better idea!

Where there's a fish... ...there's a way!
Where there's a fish... ...there's a way!
Where there's a fish... ...there's a way!

We don't want to go to war today but the Lord of the Fish...

[Pearly Di]

As for PJ's Elrond, as I've said at least a million times before, he is much more consistent with the Elves of the Silmarillion, particularly Thingol, then he is with the Elrond of Tolkien's LOTR.

Yes.

(Although I have to say, what a berk Thingol was at the end ...!!! Silly, SILLY man ... oops, I mean, Elf. )

I, too, love Elrond in the Aragorn/Arwen reunion scene in ROTK, Prim.

PJ's Elrond makes me laugh. First time I watched FOTR (and it was love at first sight) I kept on thinking, 'what IS his problem? Don't they have enough coffee in Rivendell or something?'

[Alatar]

On to Episode 2 of the Rankin Bass Tribute.

What to say about this clip. I thought that it defied description, but I'll make the attempt.

In this clip, Samwise (voiced by Roddy McDowall) finds the Ring that Frodo has inexplicably dropped in the Middle of a road when being captured by the Orcs. Samwise was presumably washing his pots and pans at the time, cause there's no explanation of why he's outside the tower and Frodo is inside. Anyway, he is tempted by the ring, which curiously starts it's seduction with his eyebrows, making them throb alarmingly. It then moves onto his Torso making it flash like a neon sign. While this happens we get a charming ditty about "The Bearer of the Ring". Finally, Samwise falls into a full-fledged acid trip along with swirly lights in which he leads an Army (of about 7 men apparently) to storm the dark tower of "barra-derr" and challenge the lord "Saw-ron". As bad as all this sounds, it pales into insignificance when we see the next part. He commands the plain of "Gorra - Gorrath" to sprout and grow into a Garden, then all the Orcs magically transform into fluffy monkeys and birds.

You think I'm joking? Then view the marvel that is:

The Choices of Master Samwise

[Voronwë the Faithful]

Okay, you've got me. I have to watch this.

*downloading*

[Jude]

Don't say you haven't been warned.

[Voronwë the Faithful]