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PostPosted: Wed Apr 26, 2006 8:30 pm 
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So, what about it, The One Ring?

I happen to know that lots of people don't come here first when they join. What is being done about these miscreants?

Now I'm not a legal expert but I happen to know that since "COME HERE FIRST" in the welcome forum name is in ALL CAPS it has the force of common law behind it.* I think TORN could better explain this SUBTLE POINT OF LAW if he was here.



*---Did you know that if you type YOU ARE MY WIFE to someone ( in all caps, of course ) it will result in a common law marriage, even if the person you type it to is a man?


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 26, 2006 10:31 pm 
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:rofl:

We shall devise brave punishments for them! =:)

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Eine Blume der Asche meines Herzens


but being a cheerful hobbit he had not needed hope, as long as despair could be postponed.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 12:18 am 
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not something I would recommend
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Faramond, YOU ARE MY WIFE.


*waits*

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 12:36 am 
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You know, I think the Yov-Faramond thing is a marvelous idea. You two could get married at the moot in SF. And you really could get married at the moot in SF too. I wonder if they allow marriages in threes? Because then Griffy wouldn't be deported. :P

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 12:56 am 
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:shock:

yov, do you KNOW how sharp a Griffon's claws are?

:shock:


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 1:37 am 
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not something I would recommend
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Bah. Griffy's all the way in South Africa. What could she possibly do to me?

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 1:49 am 
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Quote:
What is the penalty for not COMING HERE FIRST?


A spanking!


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 1:55 am 
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yovargas wrote:
Bah. Griffy's all the way in South Africa. What could she possibly do to me?


<Ominous V.O>

Not for long!

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"Too many Fingolfins, not enough Sams."

Yes.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 2:21 am 
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Did you know that if you type YOU ARE MY WIFE to someone ( in all caps, of course ) it will result in a common law marriage,

Darn. I always thought it had to be typed into a hotel register.

Meanwhile there is a very severe punishment for not coming here first. Yes, precious. And a reward for turning people in. :twisted:

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 2:40 am 
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Faramond wrote:
I happen to know that lots of people don't come here first when they join. What is being done about these miscreants?


I would support a lifetime ban for a first offense, without warning.

Quote:
Now I'm not a legal expert but I happen to know that since "COME HERE FIRST" in the welcome forum name is in ALL CAPS it has the force of common law behind it.* I think TORN could better explain this SUBTLE POINT OF LAW if he was here.


Why doesn't anyone TELL ME THESE THINGS? I've been going to this alleged "academic institution" for the past three years, and supposedly this is how it works. You pay them A LOT OF MONEY and in return THEY MAKE YOU A LEGAL EXPERT who knows fancy stuff about the law like how much you can legally bill people without it being extortion and what you can get away with without facing a malpractice suit. But no one ever told me this jazzy legal doctrine about INTERNET FORUM THAINS being able to MAKE COMMON LAW by TYPING IN ALL CAPS. I was under the mistaken impression that REALLY EGOTISTICAL POWERS THAT BE called JUDGES do that. Clearly this "academic institution" has been TELLING ME LIES. I'm going to sue. Assuming they haven't lied to me about how you do that.

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*---Did you know that if you type YOU ARE MY WIFE to someone ( in all caps, of course ) it will result in a common law marriage, even if the person you type it to is a man?


No, I didn't! My - I think they're calling themselves a "school" - told me some nonsense about common law marriages having "elements" like the couple "living together by mutual consent" for a certain period of time and holding themselves out to the world as married. Again, I HAVE BEEN DECEIVED. Obviously I should have spent more time posting on message boards over the past years (oh wait) and I would have learned more about the common law. (this is probably true)

In any case. Faramond, we're a board of capable, above-average individuals. Why are we talking about the "common" law? We should talk about elitist law instead.

And, to everyone who is reading this, because there's just never enough lovin' to go around... YOU ARE MY WIFE. No such thing as too many of those.

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I won't just survive
Oh, you will see me thrive
Can't write my story
I'm beyond the archetype
I won't just conform
No matter how you shake my core
'Cause my roots, they run deep, oh

When, when the fire's at my feet again
And the vultures all start circling
They're whispering, "You're out of time,"
But still I rise
This is no mistake, no accident
When you think the final nail is in, think again
Don't be surprised, I will still rise


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 6:13 am 
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<is Nel's wife>

<one of them anyway>

<see the Mormon thread for up-to-the-minute discussion of polygyny>

I think people getting married is a sign of a healthy message board, especially if everyone marries everyone else.

I think people who don't COME HERE FIRST are going to miss out on the chance to be Nel's wife. That's probably punishment enough.

<wanders off in search of a Popsicle, or perhaps some watermelon sherbet>

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― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 8:11 am 
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*stalks in on sizable Griffon paws*

*swwwwlicckkk*

That, Yov, is the sound of a Griffon's claws deploying. Tremble and cower, brief mortal, for I am ... *ahem. Heh heh*

*uses one claw to carefully punch in sentence, but mortally wounds keyboard all the same*

YOU ARE MY WIFE. ANGBASDIL. ANTHY. ELFSHADOW. FARAMOND. JNYUSA. NERDANEL. PRIM. SASS. TRUEHOBBIT. YOV.

There. I got lots of good good ones :D In alphabetical order no less!


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 11:55 am 
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I guess none of you know 'The League of Gentlemen' and Papa Lazarou with his YOU'RE MY WIFE NOW.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 12:23 pm 
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If I marry Faramond and Faramond marries Griffy and Griffy marries Anthy, does that mean Anthy and I are married? :scratch:

I got dibs on Toshy!

Tosh, YOU ARE MY WIFE!
(does this law not work for getting husbands?? :help: )

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 3:44 pm 
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yov,

Any TRUE LEGAL EXPERT knows that the ANGLO-AMERICAN COMMON LAW OF MESSAGEBOARDS has historically DISCRIMINATED AGAINST MEN and given WOMEN LOTS OF SPECIAL PRIVILEGES. Like naming other women their wives, a true common-law-of-messageboards classic, as Griffy and Prim can join me in attesting.

But with hard work and perseverence, YOU CAN OVERCOME. I advise beginning with civil disobedience. But in the meantime, I think you became my wife too. =:)

_________________
I won't just survive
Oh, you will see me thrive
Can't write my story
I'm beyond the archetype
I won't just conform
No matter how you shake my core
'Cause my roots, they run deep, oh

When, when the fire's at my feet again
And the vultures all start circling
They're whispering, "You're out of time,"
But still I rise
This is no mistake, no accident
When you think the final nail is in, think again
Don't be surprised, I will still rise


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 8:04 pm 
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I suppose I'm too late for the mass wedding.

[sigh]

That would be the story of my life.

They say you gain on the swings what you lose in the roundabouts, but I always get stuck in the roundabouts ... rolling around and around and around ... do you know how hard it is for a ring to turn right or left? ... by the time I arrive anywhere the party is over.

Did someone at least think to save me a piece of the cake?

It would be nice if it were a piece of cake with an icing flower on it, but I'll take whatever I can get.


Last edited by The One Ring on Mon Jul 23, 2007 11:01 am, edited 2 times in total.

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 10:31 pm 
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*gets in line with the other wives for the wedding kiss with Griff and nerdanel*

I thought we'd all been wearing you in turns, One Ring!
Are we legally married if we have not been wearing The One Ring? :scratch:
*would ask nerdanel but can't afford it; wonders if she will give her a special price, being her wife and all*

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Eine Blume der Asche meines Herzens


but being a cheerful hobbit he had not needed hope, as long as despair could be postponed.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 10:44 pm 
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HEY!!!

I asked Hobby first!!!1

<sulks>


Well, I guess I'll have to make due with being Griffy's wife, and yov's.

:love:

Hmmmm... If I marry Prim, is that incest?

:scratch:

I think I'll just scoop up this delish looking piece of cake with the big flower icing-- it's right in the path of that big rolling ring!-- and think on this a while.

:P


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 11:05 pm 
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Smoo00000ooooches Anthy :kiss:

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Eine Blume der Asche meines Herzens


but being a cheerful hobbit he had not needed hope, as long as despair could be postponed.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 28, 2006 12:02 am 
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:D


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